February 3, 2008

Pats Feel Slighted by Jordin Sparks

Bill Belichick today lamented the latest indignation suffered by the Patriots. The league, again trying to undermine the Pats, selected American Idol Jordin Sparks to sing the national anthem. Of course, Jordin is the daughter of former Giants' cornerback Phillippi Sparks.

Belichick said, "It's not fair for the league to show preference to one of the two teams participating in the Super Bowl. Between ignoring the death of Marquise Hill, suspending Rodney Harrison for taking steps to protect his body and punishing us for taping Robert Kraft's grandson's bar mitzvah afterparty at the Meadowlands, the league and new commissioner Roger Goodell have it out for us. This is the last straw. Phillippi's daughter? Teddy Bruschi has cute kids too you know."

Belichick suggested that John Edward Thomas Moynihan should be allowed to coo backup vocals. Thus far, the league has not responded to his request. Vegas has taken note, however, and moved the spread to favor the Patriots by 37. The over/under was not changed.

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